You may remember back here where I decided to give up Facebook for the month of March. I wasn’t very successful…I did manage not to post anything on Facebook for the entire month, or respond to anyone on there, but I did give in and check it most days after the first week!
After this experience, I quickly realised how much of an addictive thing Facebook had become in my life. I felt the urge to check it…all the time…and this was unhealthy. I also hated the fact that it took away my time as a ‘mother’ to Peach and I started becoming a bit absent. As she would be playing, it was very easy to just sit beside her and scroll through the news feeds, seeing what everyone was up to. I really believe God was doing a work in me to make me understand that Facebook was somewhat a disease I needed to rid myself of. It wasn’t a hard decision, and sometime in the beginning of April I deleted our account and haven’t looked back.
However, it didn’t take me long to find something to replace Facebook in my life….and it was called ‘Instagram’. Another social media app where you post pictures of whatever you please. People can follow you, and you can follow others. You can comment on peoples pictures and hash tag them into a category for the world to see. At first, I didn’t see it as a problem at all. I only had close friends or family following me and I was really just using it to put pictures of Peach up for them to see. But then, my followers started increasing, people I didn’t even know were wanting to ‘follow’ me and my pictures…and you know what….it felt good. It was nice seeing that number of people go up and I would look forward to checking in to see what new comments people had put on my pictures and if anyone new was following me.
I caught up with a beautiful girlfriend during the week, one who has been through an extremely tough time this last year. She lost her first born, a beautiful baby girl, at birth. She is absolutely amazing, and the fact that she has remained steadfast in her faith, relying on Gods goodness and faithfulness in such a traumatic situation, is testament to her beautiful relationship with Christ. We got chatting about social media, and how she also is no longer on Facebook and how she doesn’t miss it either. She was saying her friends are always asking her to come back on so that she can not ‘miss out’ on anything! Its funny how quickly people forget that you can still be a part of someone’s life without living vicariously through Facebook or social media! We discussed how you end up following and having so many people follow you that aren’t necessarily great friends, just acquaintances…. but they end up knowing every intricate detail of your life and what you have been up to! I remember going to a gathering a couple of months back and people who i didnt even know came up to Peach and I and said “Oh, this is Peach – i feel like I know her already!!” It was pretty confronting and scary really!
We also spoke about how Instagram and Facebook becomes such a pin up board for the perfect life and it can be quite a selfish feat. You end up comparing yourself to the lives other people are ‘living’….or the lives you believe they are living through the select images and posts they put up! People appear to have such perfect lives on there….it is easy to feel quite complacent with your own and with the things you do during the week! That, along with looking forward to seeing what people have to say about your pictures or your posts and comments, for me, I began to realise was quite a vain thing.
This last week, I again am feeling the heart of God give me a gentle nudge. What am i really using this app for? How much time am I spending on it as opposed to spending time with my daughter or time spent with God? I quickly felt shame and have realised that again, I need to make some changes. I do love instagram for the fact of sharing photos of Peach with my family, so I will be cutting it right back to have only family and friends that live away that will be able to follow my photos on Instagram. I will only be posting photos of Peach, and the occasional shot of me or Mr O with her as a family {In time, I may even get rid of it totally, and just stick to the good old fashioned emails to close family and friends!} There is no need to be posting pictures of what I am eating for lunch, of selfish ‘selfie’ shots of myself, just so I can get ‘approval’ from others as to how I look. My approval should be coming from only one person, and that is God himself. I shouldn’t be glorifying myself the way I have been.
1 Timothy 2:9 (NIV) says “I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.
I also like how this is worded in the Message:
1 Timothy 2:9“And i want women to get in there with the men in humility before God, not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it“
This isn’t for everyone, and a lot of people don’t struggle with addictions to social media the way I have in the past…but this is something that i have been convicted by in my spirit and in my life and it is time for me to stop conforming and start transforming my life the way God wants me to live it!
I am sure there may be other things that may pop up as temptations to distract me as I go through this journey to being a more present mumma, wife and daughter of Christ, but I know that with his strength, and if i continue to listen to his gentle nudgings, I will stay on the straight and narrow.
Much love
x
finding her purpose 